The Night Before Fistmas

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‘Twas weeks before Christmas at Nationals Park,
The ballpark was empty, and awfully dark,
But in one little office, a man sat in wait,
Wondering how he could make his team great
His name was Mike Rizzo, and he hatched a plan
To trade for a starter, but who’d be his man?
Jeff Samardzija is cheaper, but not all that great.
And that Max Scherzer fella? Too expensive, I’ll wait.
On Scherzer, Samardzija, and David Price too,
He asked about all, but not one would do
He was perplexed, even puzzled, confounded, confused!
He’d thought of most everything, but not been enthused!
Till one day it hit him, as he sat in the dark,
“What about Fister?” He’d ask on a lark.
So he called up Dombrowski, GM of Detroit,
To see what team weaknesses he could exploit.
“I hear you have excess of starters to trade,
“I like your guy Fister,” Mike hoped and he prayed,
That Dave didn’t want him, or didn’t think highly
Of his pitcher, Doug Fister, maybe he preferred Smyly.
“He’s tall, but with no real mechanical flaws,”
He mentioned, just hoping there’d be no guffaws.
“We know you’ve been trying to free up some cash,
“By trading a starter from your loaded stash
“In this sort of thing, we’d be keen to help out,
“We’ll work out a trade, and it won’t be a rout.”
And Dave thought for a while; his cheeks seemed real rosy
He responded to Mike, “Hey, we like Lombardozzi!
“He plays all positions, he can field, he can hit,
“But he helps us the most on account of his grit.”
Rizzo sat in his chair, pondering what he had heard.
A taker for Lombo? Wow, that’s just absurd!
“And throw in that Krol guy,” Dombrowski then quipped.
“And we also wonder, “Can Jordan be flipped?”
But Rizzo was steadfast; Jordan wouldn’t move.
“Maybe Rob Ray, maybe then you’ll approve?’
Rizzo let out a smile, he’d gotten his guy,
And he hoped that his even-keeled tone would belie
The joy that he felt; he’d accomplished his goal!
He’d gotten Doug Fister, and hadn’t lost Cole.
And all throughout Natstown, the people rejoiced,
The pitcher they got was their number one choice.
Beloved by the coaches and also the SABRs,
They stood in approval of Mike Rizzo’s labors.
They went onto Twitter and said, with good reason,
World Series or Bust! And to all, a good season.

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